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Fearing the Future
By: Edward B. Toupin
When we were children, we were fearless. We would stick our
hands in the fire, chew on the beetle bugs, and eat that dirt.
But, over time, we learned those things that we should not do
through experience and from "parental voices" --- those baseless
fears passed down through the generations. Later in life, we
learned that fire burns, beetle bugs are "yucky" and dirt is not
nutritious. But, we also learned all of the things that our
parents learned, including their fears and phobias, and
integrated those lessons into our own "belief systems."
Our belief systems are the basis of our personalities and the
foundations of our directions in life --- they are the rules by
which we live. In essence, our fears, desires, and values define
each of us. We are what we believe --- including our fears.
However, consider what your current fears are that prevent you
from moving forward. Realize that these fears are of things that
we were taught and those things that we learned on our own ---
in the past. Fear is based on past experiences and not on those
things that we have not yet encountered. With that, we only fear
what we've "already experienced." The "fear of the unknown" is
doubt in the future based on the circumstances that we've
encountered in the past.
Since we are what we believe, we can change who we are by
enhancing our belief systems. To overcome your fears, you must
first determine if the fear is based on something learned
through experience or taught to us by parental voices. Fears
that are taught or passed down to us can be more prominent than
those we learn from personal experiences because we don't know
why we fear such things. We can overcome fears through rational
thinking if we're able to learn why such situations occurred
that caused the fear. But, if we don't know the basis, we won't
look further because we fear what we "might" find.
If you don't know why you have certain fears and cannot
rationalize them, they need to be eliminated. Baseless fears are
unreal and create a false blockage and a reason to give up,
surrender, and rest in a comfort zone. Determine which fears are
baseless and replace them with practical experiences. Realistic
fears based on actual experiences can be rationalized and
resolved. These resolutions can then be integrated into our
lives to learn lessons and move forward in life.
Once we are able to define and diffuse our core fears, we can
then rely on the fear of returning to our prior state or not
succeeding in our life to drive us forward. You can then devise
a plan of action to reach your Vision and focus on desires of
success and fulfillment instead of hiding in the dark from the
empty fears of our "parental voices."
Copyright (c) 2004 Edward B. Toupin
About the Author:
Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor,
Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las
Among other things, he authors books, articles, and
screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life
organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print
and electronic books as well as his articles covering various
For more information, e-mail Edward at firstname.lastname@example.org or
visit his site at http://www.make-life-great.com or
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