Making Peace to Keep the Peace of Mind

Inspiration, Motivational, Tough Love!

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Have you ever stewed over something so long that you got on your own nerves?

Oh. Yeah, me neither.

How about this, then? Have we (as in you and I who know much better than to stew) ever KNOWN anyone who stewed so long that THEY got on our nerves.

Ah, yes! Of course we have. Annoying, right? Stew pots.

I guess, to a certain extent, it’s ony natural to stew in your own juices from time to time. If you have anything at all cooking in your mind, body, and soul, you will from time to time boil in it. Okay, yes…even you and I.

Something will go so completely opposite from the way we’d tried to steer it that we’ll just have a hard time moving past it. I especially hate it when I some people chase things down to stew over them. You know, things that have been waaay back there on the horizon for years. We’ll They’ll put their life in Reverse just to go back and brood about it a little more. When you think about it in those terms it’d make you want to kick yourself, wouldn’t it? IF you ever did it, that is.

But what about the things that go one direction while our hopes and dreams lie in the other in the present? Don’t we have Squatter’s Rights to stew on those??? I’ll take it upon myself to say, “Yes, in fact, we do have Squatter’s Rights to stew on things that happen in the present.” But I’d also take it upon myself to ask, “Why?!?!”

Stewing in our own juices doesn’t move us forward in any way whatsoever. It just makes us all pink, wrinkly, puckery, and well, ugly. A goal of yours? Mine either.

So how does one avoid the pot altogether or climb out of it if they’re already in it – amongst the bubbles? There are a few suggestions and/or thoughts about the situation below. Read over them and see which might apply to your “friend” the stew pot. My buddy likes the first two.

  • Throw your sense of humor into the mix. Life is, actually, a lot funnier than we even realize. The main reason, of course, is that people are a lot funnier than we even realize. Even the ones that actually turn the boiler on beneath our pot(s) are characters worth at least a couple of laughs. The next time you feel a bubble or two bubbling beneath your surface, look for the humor in the situation. Imagine that what’s going on around you is playing out on a screen (large…small, your choice). What will amaze you is that 8 times out of 10, you’ll quickly realize that you’re smack dab in the middle of a comedy, not a drama…and certainly not a tragedy. Try it – I swear on my Starbucks Card AND my good standing at Kohl’s, you’ll soon be living by this one. And when I say living, I mean Living with a capital L.
  • Memorize and Utilize the Serenity Prayer:

    God grant me the serenity
    to accept the things I cannot change;
    courage to change the things I can;
    and wisdom to know the difference.

    Living one day at a time;
    Enjoying one moment at a time;
    Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
    Taking, as He did, this sinful world
    as it is, not as I would have it;
    Trusting that He will make all things right
    if I surrender to His Will;
    That I may be reasonably happy in this life
    and supremely happy with Him
    Forever in the next.
    Amen.

    –Reinhold Niebuhr

    Let’s face it, sometimes we actually ARE in more of a drama than a comedy. We’d very much like to call for a Rewrite of the script, but we’re stuck with it AS IS. That’s when we have to let those last four words sink in: We’re. Stuck. With. It. Your son marries a girl you KNOW isn’t “good enough” (are they ever?)…you’ve made the whole parental speech, but Romeo is set on marrying Juliet. When we argue at that point, aren’t we kind of like a Baseball Coach arguing AFTER the call. Even if it’s a bad one, it’s been made! The guy behind the plate isn’t going to say, “Man, I’m sorry Mr. LaRussa. You’re right, I wouldn’t know a strike from my… Let me change that call real fast. STRIKE!” Nor is Romeo apt to say, “You’re ever so right, father/mother. Juliet does wear too much eyeliner. What was I thinking? Please…please…please find the perfect girl for me.” Four more words: When. Hell. Freezeth. Over.

  • Can’t laugh about it, can’t move past it? Then you’re just going to have to stew. Seem like a mad crazy option? It is. Think it’s weird of me to list it with the others? It’s totally weird. But, what’s weirder still is the fact that it’s the option most will return to again and again. You’ll be able to recognize the people who do – it’s not at all hard. They’ll be the ones walking about all pink and wrinkly without an ounce of Peace of Mind. What’s even sadder is they’re the ones who don’t let those around them have any Peace of Mind either. The women in the office who stew over the tone of voice a co-worker used, the husband who stews because his wife got a speeding ticket (I said I was sorry!), the wife who boils because her husband tracked leaves in, the teenager who acts like his life is over because he was asked to make Fall Out Boy fall out a little more quietly.

The post has already been longer than I intended – I know it’s a pain to get caught in the middle of a post or article you think just might never end. You get the idea.

To stew or not to stew is alot like to live or not to live. Sometimes we just have to MANUALLY pull ourselves up out of the pot – the view it provides isn’t that amazing anyway. Then we have to kick the pot over (We’re all about the drama, right?), turn our back on it and…..

….and….

…and live, that’s what!

Make each pot kick count double,
Joi

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