Choose the Subject of Your Thoughts Carefully

Think PositivelyRemember in high school when you were faced with the task of choosing subjects for the upcoming semester?  If you were planning for college, you were careful to select subjects that would meet your chosen school’s criteria.  If you had a career in business in mind, you chose classes that would prepare you for that road. 

If you went to college, you became even more expereinced in choosing subjects.

The subjects we chose in school determined our degree and shaped our education.  Good selection was of the utmost importance! However, we choose even more important subjects on a daily basis without even truly realizing it.  Yet these very choices determine far more than an education or degree – they determine our character and shape our life. 

I’m talking, of course, about our thoughts.  Our thoughts are often found woefully lacking, which sadly, rubs off onto our character.  Given the fact that our character pretty much determines the life we’ll lead, it’s easy to see why we should start paying A LOT more attention to the thoughts that we allow, and even invite, into our heads.

In a brilliant little book titled Inspiration and Ideals, from 1917, Grenville Kleiser put it this way:

If you once form the habit of selecting and dwelling upon important subjects only, you will have neither time nor inclination for the petty worries that beset so many lives.  Anxiety, irritation, despair, fear and the like, are mental, and therefore must be destroyed mentally.  As you realize the folly of these habits, you will more diligently strive to eliminate them from your life.  They are not only worthless, but a serious handicap in the face for success.  Think constructively, and doubtful and discordant elements will fall away from inanition (starvation).

I love that – starve negativity to death!

Notice how he refers to negative thoughs as “a serious handicap?”  If we were to start thinking of the following thoughts as handicaps, I’m certain we’d work harder to get rid of them:

  • Worries
  • Regrets
  • Guilt
  • Self Doubt
  • Self Ridicule
  • Pointless Daydreams
  • Anger

Let’s vow to start recognizing these negative thoughts the very minute they show up.  Instead of inviting them to kick up their heels and get comfortable, let’s show them the door pronto. After all, if they’re invited in, they’ll invite other unsavory characters over and…well, nothing good will come from any of it.

Just as we’re careful about the people we associate with, we have to be careful about the thoughts we entertain. 

Positive, constructive thoughts will take us places!  Negative, destructive thoughts will take us nowhere.

Positive, constructive thinking will make us.  Negative, destructive thinking will break us.

The choice is ours.

H.G. Glasow Quote: Agree or Disagree?


We’re starting a new “Category” on Out of Bounds today. Joining the categories we already have [ Affirmation, Education, Infiltration, Information, Inspiration, Mental Flexation, Motivation, Quotation, Relaxation, and Versification ] – will be the new category: Rumination. To “ruminate” is, of course, to “ponder, think out, rationalize, meditate on… to put your thinking cap on and use it like it hasn’t been used in a while!”

As a mental fitness guru, I’m just straight up all about that! I want to poke at your brain cells and get them moving and grooving. It’s the best thing in the world for you. Maybe EVEN better than green tea, and you know how I push that.

That’s why we’re launching “Rumination.”

Don’t get me wrong, I want you to think about, and comment on each post I ever add to the blog. I love your comments and certainly learn more from reading your words than I do from reading my own. So, please keep them coming.

I’m going to challenge you, however, with posts under the category, “Rumination.” Sometimes, such as the one today – there’ll be a topic or quote. I’ll ask if you agree or disagree. In the comments, I want you to tell why you agree or why you disagree.

Other times, the post may pose a riddle or mind game for you to figure out and unravel. I love those – what’s more, our minds absolutely thrive on this sort of thing. You can even feel a natural little high after you’ve given your mind a good workout. It’s similar to the one that comes after a great physical workout.

Okay, I think you have the general idea!

Now for today’s Agree or Disagree:

H.G. Glasow once said, “The fewer the facts, the stronger the opinion.” Interesting quote, no?

He certainly makes a great point. Some people dig their heels in as deep as they’ll go and raise their voice as high as it’ll go, leaving you with the impression that they’re just trying to compensate for one simple fact: They’re running on little, if any, information.

It’s as though they think that if they’re loud enough, everyone will assume they’re right. They’re probably also thinking that if they come across as angry and definitive, no one will ask any questions. Questions they KNOW they couldn’t answer in a billion Sundays!

However, on the other side of the proverbial fence, knowledge is fuel and the more fuel we have, the more drive we’ll have. Hmmmm…

So what are your thoughts? Even if you have something to say on BOTH sides of the fence, I’m fine with that…just have your say on one side, then climb over and speak your mind there. After all, you’ll be doing twice as much thinking, right?

Make each moment count double,
~ Joi

What’s Your VISION and What Are You Doing to Make it a Reality?

Vision is the Art

Jonathan Swift said, “Vision is the art of seeing what is invisible to others.” Is that an amazing quote, or what? The longer you think about it, the more amazing it is.

Whether we call them visions, dreams, or aspirations – we all have them. We each picture how we want our life to be and we picture the “us” that’s in it. We have a vision of just who we want to be and we know the things we want to accomplish. No one else can see our visions but us, and that makes them pure gold. If they can’t see them, they can’t tell us that we’re wrong, they can’t get in our way, and they sure can’t take them away from us. They’re ours, all ours!

A sad reality is that sometimes we lose sight of our visions and dreams. We get busy with this thing called life and we lose touch with what it is we actually want from it. Instead, we get way too wrapped up in what it wants from us. Another pitfall is that we often get caught up in other people’s lives instead of our own. We’ll worry about what this person’s doing, where that person’s headed, what she’s thinking, what he’s doing wrong, etc. While it’s all fine and well – and even highly commendable – to be concerned with others, we aren’t doing them or ourselves any favors when we lose ourselves or our visions along the way.

It helps to frequently spend time alone with yourself and your thoughts. I’d even suggest picking a time of the day to do just that. Whether it’s on the way home from the office, while doing dishes, or even while taking a bath/shower at the end of the day. Set aside a period of time to hold yourself accountable. Remind yourself of your visions and dreams – then ask yourself, “What did I do today that brought me one step closer to my vision?” Also, “What did I do today that kept me rooted in place, neither going forward or backward?” Finally, “What did I do today that took me one step away from my vision?”

Knowing that you’ll have to face this line of questioning at the end of the day will keep your eyes focused on your goal during the day.

One more thing about visions. While it sounds incredibly stirring and wonderful to say things like, “Never give up, no matter what your vision is – never, ever give up….” – there’s something to keep in mind. If you’re playing a sport, it’s good to plant yourself firmly in position right? Let’s say you’re playing in a baseball game. You’re playing center field. You know your position when you take the field, right? You don’t go to the left..you don’t go to the right. You know where center is and you head off in that direction. As the pitcher throws the ball, you’re set in your position. But what if the batter doesn’t hit the ball right to you? How foolish would it be to think, “I’m staying put! If I believe in myself enough, I can stretch my arm a good 12 feet and…” And, you’re off the team, that’s what!

You’re a better player than that, though! You reposition yourself according to the flight of the ball and…. And, “Out one!” – that’s what.

Yes, our visions are golden and yes, we should hold them close to us. However, there are certain situations when they may need to be adjusted – according to the flight of life. Take, for instance, the men and women who’ve been told they can’t conceive. They hope, pray, believe, and even envision a miracle pregnancy. While anything is possible (especially if God is on your team), many families would have missed out on the most beautiful thing that ever happened to them if they hadn’t “repositioned” and chosen to adopt. There isn’t an adoptive parent in the world who’ll tell you they had to “settle” – they’ll tell you the absolute truth, they simply had to switch positions to find their precious child. Their “vision” still came true – it simply came from another direction.

Whether you’re able to stand your ground or you have to reposition to get what you want, keep your eyes on the ball. Hold yourself accountable at the end of one day and strive to do better the next. Everything you want from life is just around the corner. The only thing is, it won’t come to you – you have to go get it!

Make each vision count double,
~ Joi

The ridiculously gorgeous
Vision is the Art Art Print (above) is available at AllPosters.com

Wisdom for Today From a Book Belonging to Yesterday

I know I’ve said it before, but I absolutely love books. Everything about them – the looks, the smells, the rush of buying a new one, the joy of discovering an old one, and more than anything, I love getting lost in the words.

One of my favorite authors is Grenville Kleiser. If you haven’t heard of the brilliant author, you are more than forgiven. His books were published in the early 1900s. They do, however, still have a place in our modern world – or at least they should have. His writings and teachings are so beautiful and basic, I’m convinced we’d all be happier, wealthier, and wiser if we read a little Kleiser each day.

The following passage is from a Grenville Kleiser book published in 1917 called, “Inspiration and Ideals.” Enjoy!

CHOOSE YOUR LIFE IDEALS

Dwell more and more upon thoughts of what you really want in your life. Close and hermetically seal the door of your mind against thoughts of what you do not want in your life. You desire health, vitality, wisdom, peace, confidence, hope, friendship, harmony, independence, serenity, cheerfulness, happiness, success, culture, and righteousness. Give your thought to these and kindred subjects, since dwelling upon them often and intently tends to make them concrete in your life. Waste no thought upon things you do not need. The power is yours to choose the ideals that shall daily possess and govern your mental life. When your mind is right your life will be right.

Basically, what you just read in the paragraph above, is the equivalent of a pricey Self Help book. All summed up beautifully in a compact little package with a bow on it. The tag reads, “To you: The secret of a better life! From: Grenville Kleiser”

Make each moment count double,
~ Joi

Dangers of Stress

Stress has its gnarly-fingered hand in every disease known to man. So it shouldn’t be too big a surprise to learn how the same unsightly hand can be found in rapid aging.

The stress hormone cortisol LITERALLY shrinks the hippocampus – the part of the brain that’s essential to memory and thinking. Doing so ages the brain much sooner than it wants to age!

The brain isn’t, of course, the only part of our bodies that cortisol goes after. High levels of cortisol also causes to put on fat around the middle. Not only is it something we don’t want to see when we’re in the dressing room trying on a killer pair of jeans, it’s a situation that poses an unbelievable health risk. Again, aging our bodies much sooner than it wants to age.

As I’ve said on this blog (as well as on Self Help Daily), stress is one of those things we cannot keep taking for granted or making jokes about. We darned sure don’t need to wear it like a badge of honor! (“I’ve been so busy I’m three days behind on my e-mail.”) Stress is a serious situation that only leads to more serious situations.

I try to avoid stress – it makes me feel like I’m rubber-stamping all my organs “Urgent.” – Berri Clove

There are countless articles and books written on stress, but what works as a coping solution for one person might not work for the next. For example, when I’m feeling a little strung out, taking a drive with something amazing from Starbucks, blaring “Sweet Home, Alabama” on the cd player does me a world of good. The first few beats of the song (1-2-3—Turn it up...) makes everything as cool as an October breeze. A 30 minute walk, playing with my cats, taking a bath, talking with my family, reading Dean Koontz – they’re all my favorite ways to chill-ax (the beautiful place where chilling becomes relaxation!).

Experts say that the one thing that seems to work for everyone is meditation. All this means is taking a few minutes each day to quiet your mind, calm your nervous system, lower your heart rate and oxygenate your brain with deep breathing. As important as we all know that eating right is, and as much respect as we have for exercise and daily activity – we should realize that this period of time is just as important. Maybe even more so.

Our bodies can be as fit and strong as an Olympian athlete’s, but if our mental health isn’t just as fit, what good does that body actually do us?

If your teeth are clenched and your fists are clenched, your lifespan is probably clenched. – Adabella Radici

In the race to acquire bigger and better, stronger and faster – we HAVE to bear in mind that if we aren’t careful, we’ll be sacrificing our mental and emotional well-being in the process. When you feel the least amount of stress creeping into your life, get it out asap. The longer it’s allowed to linger, the more “at home” it makes itself and the harder it is to get rid of.

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. – Natalie Goldberg

Make each relaxing moment count double,
~ Joi
More Quotes about Stress.

A Cure for Lucy-itis


In one of my all-time favorite books, Life’s Little Instruction Book, one of the “instructions” is: Just to see how it feels, for the next twenty-four hours refrain from criticizing anybody or anything. Very cool idea – but a wee bit on the tough-ish side if you’re a parent (no matter how perfect your children are.)

I do love the premise behind the thought, though. Criticism is a very sensitive area, and the line between constructive I-really-just-want-to-help advice and destructive I-criticize-and-find-fault-with-each-breath is as thin as Burt Reynold’s hair.

Another great book, Speaker’s Sourcebook II, reminds us of a Peanuts Comic Strip that amusingly sums up critics:

Linus, with thumb in mouth and blanket in hand, turns to Lucy and asks, “Why are you always so anxious to criticize me?”

Lucy responds as we’d expect: “I just think I have a knack for seeing other people’s faults.”

Linus throws up his hands and asks, “What about your own faults?”

Our girl, Lucy, doesn’t hesitate a second before answering, “I have a knack for overlooking them.”

There we have it, human nature summed up in a classic comic strip!

I’m a little bit different from most people when it comes to overly critical people. I, honestly, feel nothing but sorry for them. I had a neighbor when I was growing up who was, literally, never content or satisfied – with anything or anyone. She was always grumbling about the weather, her family, or other neighbors. Once she even complained that Thanksgiving was a holiday (I thought that one took the cake.). Most people just hated her with a passion…or strongly, strongly, strongly disliked her. I felt sorry for her. The way I saw it, the only thing worse than living NEAR her would have been living AS her. Can you imagine life from her viewpoint? Nothing is ever right, pretty, or good enough. Miserable existence – so, I guess, a person like that would (maybe without realizing it) try to force everyone else into their circle of discontentment. Then, at least they wouldn’t be alone.

It’s sad, which is why I never hated her – just pitied her. The same way I do everyone who is so easily dissatisfied and so rarely satisfied.

All of us can be overly critical at times, though. Especially if we make our minds up about something or someone. We’ll close our mind shut and become overly critical of everything about the thing (or person) we’ve shut out. I’ve done it before – not with people, mind you – but with places. We’ve moved a lot as a family and there have been several times when I didn’t want to leave one place for another…so the second place had me on its bad side right out of the bag! It has happened twice, truth be told. Each time, I caught myself pretty early and set my thinking straight. I started looking for the GOOD and forced myself to even TALK about the GOOD things. Within a matter of days, all the positive thinking paid off and I not only was content with where I was, I actually loved it.

The worst fault-finding and criticising, of course, is that toward others. People have feelings, after all, and damage to these feelings if very often irreversible. When that happens – nobody wins.

When it comes to fault finding, I think Frank A. Clark said it best: “Lots of faults we think we see in others are simply the ones we expect to find there because we have them.”

Something to think about I guess.

Make each compliment count double!
~Joi

Remembering September 11

Thousands of lives were suddenly ended by evil, despicable acts of terror. The pictures of airplanes flying into buildings, fires burning, huge structures collapsing, have filled us with disbelief, terrible sadness and a quiet, unyielding anger. President George W. Bush

The planes were hijacked, the buildings fell, and thousands of lives were lost nearly a thousand miles from here. But the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon were an attack on the heart of America.
And standing here in the heartland of America, we say in one voice – We will not give in to terrorists; We will not rest until they are found and defeated; We will win this struggle – not for glory, nor wealth, nor power, but for justice, for freedom, and for peace; So help us God. -Tom Harkin

You can be sure that the American spirit will prevail over this tragedy. -Colin Powell

A few months ago, and again this week, bin Laden publicly vowed to publicly wage a terrorist war against America, saying, and I quote, “We do not differentiate between those dressed in military uniforms and civilians. They’re all targets.” Their mission is murder, and their history is bloody. -then President Bill Clinton

All of a sudden there were people screaming. I saw people jumping out of the building. Their arms were flailing. I stopped taking pictures and started crying. – Michael Walters, Photo-Journalist

The city is going to survive, we are going to get through it, It’s going to be very, very difficult time. I don’t think we yet know the pain that we’re going to feel when we find out who we lost, but the thing we have to focus on now is getting this city through this, and surviving and being stronger for it. -Rudolph Giuliani

So, Whatcha Thinking About?

Quote about thoughts

I’ve said it before on this very blog, but I think it’s worth repeating…in fact I know it is. The mind is such a complex and amazing power that we should never underestimate the power its THOUGHTS have over our entire life.

If the brain is the center of us…and it is just that….then, whatever is going on in the control center will manifest itself outwardly.

I’m asking you to think about your thought patterns for a minute. What do you think about more than anything else? Does worry for a loved one or loved ones occupy most of your thoughts? If so, you probably neglect yourself a great deal.

For example, how many young mothers BEFORE their pregnancy and birth look like something that stepped out of a catalog? – With jewelry, hot clothes, painted nails, make-up and their hair done, they take pride in their appearance and it shows. Fast forward a year, sometimes even two or three. The same girl can very often be found…IF you recognize her! The problem isn’t the girl, physically – she’s still as beautiful as ever. It’s just that her appearance (and even herself) has taken a backseat. Her thoughts now center primarily around her child – what he/she drinks, wears, laughs at, gurgles at, etc.

Is there anything wrong with that? Of course not! I did it 3 times over – and if God ever developed a mischievous sense of humor and unmatched randomness, I’d do it a 4th time. I fell into the trap deepeer than anyone. When I was in my teens, my fingernails were never NOT pink, my hair was styled each morning, I spent $$$$ on name brand clothes and had more shoes than any shoe store worth its weight. I even smelled like Charlie perfume when I went to bed – after a 30 minute bubble bath. I was a baby diva unlike any you’d ever find.

Then. Came. Babies. My nailpolish bottles caked up, my curling iron packed its cord and ran away from home….. Charlie? I was afraid of having too much perfume around my babies (????), so I started smelling like Baby Powder – after a 3 minute bath (couldn’t be away from my girls longer than that).

So, uh, yeah, my control center was a baby nursery. I stopped my writing, except for writing in baby books or writing letters to family members. It never even hit me until one day when I was looking at old pictures. Pictures of me from the ages of 12 to 18 were so alarmingly different from recent pictures. Of all things to notice, I looked at the fingernails. In all of the old pics, they were beautiful – all done up in a hot pink or red from Avon. Hair just so… Then I looked at the more recent ones: Naked nails, ponytails, sweat pants, and t-shirts. My jaw dropped and I threw away the sweat pants.

Well, you get the point.

Another example would be the man who becomes so consumed with making money that it’s, literally, all he can think about OR talk about. Another bad deal. Work and money become all he thinks about and he begins to lose any sort of fun streak or personality. How many professionals do you meet and think, “Man, he has NO personality whatsover!” The thing is, he probably did once, before his mind became consumed with money rather than life.

Should an individual love their work – heck yes. Should an individual love their children – hell yes! But nothing….not even family…should take up every square inch of your thoughts.

Make a point of watching your thoughts for a while – see where they run off to when unsupervised. They probably have a favorite spot that you weren’t even aware of. Now, take a look at what, if anything, this retreat is costing you. Make an effort to make your thoughts as well-rounded as possible.

There’s more to it than this, though. Once you make sure you don’t put all of your thought eggs into just one basket – you have to, then, make sure that you don’t entertain negative, self-limiting, harmful thoughts.

Not long ago, I was telling my daughters how I want them to always live out loud – and never in a whisper. I want them to see how big and beautiful life is and not EVER let anything or anyone ever fence them in. In order to live life largely, you have to harness your thoughts. Negative thoughts will do as much damage as positive ones.

If you frequently think, “I’m down…” – you’ll soon be down so far you won’t be able to see up.

If you frequently think, “I’ve got to hurry!” – you’ll soon be living at such a fast pace no one will be able to (or even want to) keep up with you. Your health will also suffer greatly.

If you frequently think, “I’m so worried about…” – you guessed it, you’ll become the biggest worry wart to ever carry the title.

If you frequently think of things your mad about or people who make you angry, you’ll soon be a walking/talking temper tantrum waiting to explode. Ugly? You know it.

Let’s flip that all around now.

What would happen if you frequently thought of reasons to be happy?….

What would happen if you frequently thought of ways to show people how much you love them?…

Instead of thinking about the problems, what if you thought of ways to solve them?….

Someone once said, “You are what you eat.” – But I think Walter Anderson said it best, “You and I are not what we eat; we are what we think.” So, if you do one thing today, vow to start taking your thoughts in a positive direction – your life will follow them. Godspeed!

Make each thought count,
~Joi

Great Quote About Attitude

You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.
- Brian Tracy Quote

Click HERE for more quotes with Attitude!

Make each moment count double,
~Joi

A Quote Worth Writing Down

Here’s a quote that’ll grab you by your shoulders and give you a little shake:

“Nature takes away any faculty that is not used.” ~ William R. Inge

Let’s see, I’ll ponder it over more tomorrow – somewhere between reading Shakespeare, brushing up on my geometry, conjugating Spanish verbs, and jogging around the park. You know, one of my typical Sundays.

Make each moment count double…then read something worthwhile,
~Joi

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