Infiltration

Happy Monday Morning (and hello, oxymoron!) - what better way to celebrate Monday than by torturing your brain cells?

Click HERE for a fun little quiz that’ll get your brain humming and buzzing. On a Monday, just about any brain activiity is a plus!

Make each brain buzz count double,
~Joi

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.” Anais Nin

Terrell Owens recently demonstrated for everyone the absolute worst way in the world to handle problems. I, of course, wasn’t there and have no way of knowing the specifics - but one thing’s for certain, he didn’t handle his disappointments, they handled him.

We all have our share of troubles - things that we’d give just about anything to change. Sometimes they’re physical, sometimes they’re spiritual, and they’re always emotional.

When you’re facing something in your life, you have two choices:

1. Let it have the upper hand.

2. Demand the upper hand.

When you choose #1 - you get to mope around, have crying spells, lash out at the world for its unfairness, try to find peace in a bottle of some kind, push your loved ones away, and lose yourself in a miserable abyss - a vast chasm of the “Poor poor me!”s and, of course the “No one understand!”s.

What type of person chooses #1? Shhhhh….The coward. The one who’s afraid of a good fight.

What’s the outlook for choosing #1? Absolute and total destruction of self and everyone and everything around them.

When you choose #2 you get to sit in the driver’s seat rather than the back seat. When you’re at the wheel, you know where you are, where you’re headed, and where you want to be next. When you’re balled up in the backseat, you haven’t a clue where you’re headed - the only thing for certain is that there will be a crash.

What type of person chooses #2? The fighter! My favorite kind of person in the world - the one who gets knocked down, but doesn’t whine. He/She just gets up, doesn’t bother to dust off, looks their enemy square in the eye and asks, “Is that all you’ve got?”

What’s the outlook for choosing #2? A helluva lot better than choosing #1! When you choose to be a fighter, you’re on your feet dancing around in the middle of the ring - when you choose to be a coward, you’re on the mat already!

If you’re currently floundering on the mat - get up!!! Get your feet underneath you and start bobbing and weaving as though the knock down never happened. You’ll catch your troubles completely off guard - they aren’t used to seeing you vertical.

If you’re currently up and swinging - keep at it! My money’s on you. Well, there and Starbuck’s.

Make each swing count double,
~Joi

Something that amazes me is the threshold some people have for suffering. I’m not talking so much about physical pain, but rather mental and emotional pain. When it comes to physical pain - even the hardest head will eventually go to the doctor or dentist.

But with mental and emotional pain, the vast majority of people suffer in silence - or within earshot of their closest family members.

People often minimalize the symptoms of stress, anxiety, and/or depression. They’ll shrug it off and say, “I just feel down today…” or, “I’m not quite myself today…” And sometimes they’re right - sometimes it can be chalked up to a bad day - or even a bad week. BUT when the todays turn into weeks and the weeks turn into months, they’re further down than they realize. To make matters worse, stress, anxiety, and depression often come together with a 1-2-3 knock out punch that makes it hard for the victim to find their own legs.

Researchers are finding amazing links between the mind and the heart. We’ve all used the terms “Heartbroken,” “Heartsick,” “Heavy-hearted,” etc. We may not have realized it at the time, but our emotions are, literally, tied to our heart. With that being said, how important must it be, then, to keep our emotions and psychological state as healthy as possible. Problems such as stress, anger, and anxiety can increase the risk for coronary artery disease and the risk of dying after a heart attack.

From the Harvard Health Publications Special Health Report, The Healthy Heart: Preventing, Detecting, and Treating Coronary Artery Disease:

Psychological stress can raise blood pressure, reduce blood flow to the heart, decrease the heart’s pumping ability, trigger abnormal pumping rhythms, and activate the blood’s clotting system. Some evidence suggests that stress and constant anger may increase LDL and triglyceride levels. It appears that long-term psychological stress may also activate molecules that fuel the inflammation that is at the heart of coronary artery disease.

Something I found interesting….and surprising…is the fact that the daily stresses (such as being in an unhappy marriage, having unruly kids, job stress…) actually do more harm to our hearts than the huge traumas of life (such as losing a loved one, suffering an accident, etc.) I guess we find a way to cope with the larger issues but simply don’t know what to make of the smaller ones.

If you, or someone you care about, is suffering from depression, stress, or anxiety - start looking for solutions and keep looking until you find what works. If you have to see a doctor, make an appointment and go. If you don’t, you’ll be seeing a doctor soon enough…..for something much more serious.

Make each moment count double,
~Joi

technorati tags: stress, anxiety, depression, hearthealth, heart+health

“We teach people how to treat us.” - Phillip C. McGraw

The quote above is one of the most powerful and true sentences ever spoken. If you spend a little time alone with it, you’ll soon see relationships in your own life begin to explain themselves.

You may see mysteries unravel right before your expectant eyes. Take different people in your life, one at a time, and ask yourself, “How does_________ treat me? Is he/she comfortable around me or do they seem ‘on edge’?” Realize that if they’re “on edge” - - - - -You put them on the edge! Lighten up and they’ll come away from the edge and move closer to you. (That’s always a good thing.)

Does ————– (No relation to ________) seem to “fly easily off the handle”? Maybe you’ve put them on the defensive by being overly-critical. If you started balancing out the negatives with positives, the handle flying would diminish.

Just take a little time to delve into how people treat you and you’ll see your fingerprints plastered all over their behavior. For better or worse, you’ve basically taught them and trained them in how to treat you. The good news is, if you didn’t do a very good job - you can turn it all around.

Most of the time, our biggest mistake is trying too hard. We try to WILL people to do this, WILL them to do that, WILL them to feel this way, WILL them to feel that way…. If we were to just lighte up, enjoy life, and allow those around us to do the same, we’d all live a lot longer and smile a lot more.

Demand that each moment count!
~Joi

It’s a gorgeous early-autumn day and you’re out driving. Your window’s down and your arm is wind surfing, keeping time with Bon Jovi on the radio.

You explore parts of town you’d never really seen before, always a cool thing to do. Then you find yourself on a dead end road. You see the signs, then sure enough (as though the signs would lie), you see where the road ends and progress is a thing of the past. So, you reverse about 20 feet and drive forward again, thinking that maybe the dead end will change its mind.

Nope. Still there.

So, you reverse about 20 feet and drive forward again, thinking that maybe the dead end will change its mind.

Nope. Still there.

So, you reverse about 20 feet and drive forward again, thinking that maybe the dead end will change its mind.

Nope. Still there.

That’d be about as lame as it gets, right? Wasting a beautiful day, gas, and Jon Bon Jovi on a view that isn’t going to change and isn’t going to get you anywhere?

How about wasting a beautiful life on a similar situation? Far, far worse.

Yet countless people are in dead-end jobs or dead-end relationships and they keep doing the “reverse 20 feet, drive forward hoping things will change” routine. They do it again and again and again. When, quite possibly, the greatest job or sweetest relationship in the world could be a block or two away. But they won’t get off the dead end street to go find it!

If you’re in a dead-end relationship, don’t keep “backing up” and “going forward,” “backing up” and “going forward,” “backing up” and “going forward…” A dead end’s a dead end - a new road isn’t going to magically appear. If the signs are there, they’re there for a reason - to warn you.

The same holds true for dead-end jobs. If your job is taking you nowhere -ask yourself, “Is nowhere really where I want to go?!”

Life’s too short and too precious to spend on a dead end road. A dead end road has no future, and neither do its travellers. Whether the dead end is a job or a relationship - don’t get comfortable, you deserve better! Keep this quote in mind, “Delay breeds fear.” The longer you stay in your “reverse and drive forward” rut, the harder it’ll be to make that YOU turn.

Find a nice, scenic, wide-open road and see where it goes.

Make each moment count double,
~Joi

technorati tags: relationships, selfhelp, motivation, inspiration, advice

Below are links to two VERY important, worthwhile, I-promise-you-should-read-them articles. They’re really short, so you needn’t worry about “saving them for later” or skipping them altogether. After all, it’s our brains we’re talking about here - it doesn’t get much more vital than that!

The articles deal with the effects of stress on our brains - from memory problems to cell damage, stress leaves its footprints on our minds. Fortunately, there are things we can do about it. Of course, top of the list is finding ways to cope with what’s causing the stress in the first place. It usually isn’t too difficult to pin down. Once pinned, we have to determine if it’s caused by something within our control. If it is, we should come up with a plan to “fix” or “improve” the situation immediately. We should never wait for things to fix themselves - we have to be proactive.

If stress is caused by things that are not in our control, we should look at these problems and see if there are some worries or anxieties that we can “just let go of.” Perfect candidates for this approach are worries or concerns about what other people are doing. We can’t take on the lives of others and give our full attention to our own. Once a person 100 percent realizes that, they free up A LOT of stress and worry. You can be, and should be,concerned about others - but if that concern starts to interrupt your happiness and peace of mind, it’s time to (if the situation is right) speak your mind (i.e. “have your say,” “give your advice,” “get a few things off of your chest…”). Especially if it’s a family member or close friend - BY ALL MEANS, try to help if you can. BUT, remember we all have to make our own mistakes and find our own way.

Once you let go of some worries, anxieties, or concerns - you’ll have more energy to take on the rest. And that’s exactly what you should do. Head them off at the pass and load and lock! If your job causes you an unusual amount of stress, start looking around for another. (Many times, just giving yourself the freedom and the power to look will help. It makes you realize that you aren’t “stuck,” and you immediately feel less trapped.).

Whatever’s causing stress in your life needs to be taken out of your life - if at all possible. We get one shot at life, after all. And who wants to spend it being stressed out and tense?!?!

Here come the links (They’ll open in new windows) - please check them out. They’re very important:

Stress Can Shrink and Age Your Brain

Exercise Smartens Up the Aging Brain

We’ve all had our fair share of struggles, fights, and battles. Many of us, in fact, are probably going toe to toe with one right now. It’s just one of the things that we all have in common - each of us has our own particular battles and NO ONE gets through life without them.

It matters very little how smart we are, how wealthy, or how beautiful - everyone had better learn to fight early in life, because it’s a skill that’ll be called upon. Often. As in boxing, the better fighters will last the longest, go the furthest, and will be the last ones standing. The weaker fighters make early exits and sit in the shadows, watching and wondering where they went wrong.

The answer to that question is often one of the following:

1. They underestimated what they were up against. Many times we’ll minimize the people or situations that we have to fight against. Whether they’re habits (smoking, drinking, gambling), genetic traits (such as a bad temperment), personal struggles (weight, shyness), circumstances (poverty, illness, debt, career dissatisfaction), or people (parents, spouse, boss, children) - we often come out on the losing end because we fail to see how much power they actually have over us. We think, “I could quit smoking any time I wanted to,” when, in realtiy, nicotene is a drug that is very hard to give up. Underestimating it is only inviting it to the winner’s circle.

Continue Reading the Article >>>>>

technorati tags: selfhelp, self+help, quitsmoking, quit+smoking, personalbattles, perseverance

Medicine. Cure. Anti-depressant. Dope. Weed. Mary Jane. Witchcraft. Pot. Illegal. Should-be-legal.

Marijuana. The controversy continues. Really, you’d think that if something were illegal it would mean: CONTROVERSY OVER. It’s kind of like heading up a group effort to legalize going 95 mph rather than 65 mph. Illegal - it means don’t do it. It doesn’t matter who else is doing it, because when you’re caught….no one’s going to give a rat’s behind who else is getting away with it.

For anyone who thinks there’s still a controversy, here are a few fast facts:

• Smoking marijuana damages the brain, heart, lungs, and immune system That’s a lot of damage to a lot of very vital parts!
• Marijuana impairs learning. That’s why many parents start digging when their kid’s grades begin to slack off. It isn’t always the culprit, but it is, very often, one of the first signs. Studies done on college students proved that marijuana limits the capacity to absorb and retain information. Users fall short on memory as well as math and verbal skills.
• Marijuana affects your memory. When we’re all fighting tooth and nail to hang onto our memories and put an end to dementia and alzheimer’s - the last thing any rational human being should want is something that would wipe away precious memories.
• Marijuana interferes with your perception and judgement. You can’t be totally sure if your feelings and emotions are 100 percent yours - or are simply a result of the Marijuana.
• Like cigarettes, smoking marijuana can lead to cancer. Can you say, “Not worth the risk?!?!”
• Marijuana use has been implicated in a high percentage of automobile crashes as well as accidents in the workplace. This statistic would, of course, be a little skewered because there are a lot of accidents that aren’t reported - for obvious reasons.
• Marijuana use can bring on extremely disturbing reactions - including paranoia and hallucinations. Reactions that can turn your world into a frightening hell.
• Chronic marijuana smokers are more susceptible to chest colds, bronchitis, emphysema, and bronchial asthma. Continued use will damage lungs and airways and raise the risk of cancer. There is just as much exposure to cancer-causing chemicals from smoking one marijuana joint as smoking five tobacco cigarettes.
• Regular use can delay the onset of puberty in young men and reduce sperm production. For women, regular use may disrupt normal monthly menstrual cycles and inhibit ovulation. When pregnant women use marijuana, they run the risk of having smaller babies with lower birth weights, who are more likely than other babies to develop health problems. Nothing that messes with your hormones is anywhere near worth it!

“By characterizing the use of illegal drugs as quasi-legal, state-sanctioned, Saturday afternoon fun, legalizers destabilize the societal norm that drug use is dangerous. They undercut the goals of stopping the initiation of drug use to prevent addiction…. Children entering drug abuse treatment routinely report that they heard that ‘pot is medicine’ and, therefore, believed it to be good for them.” — Andrea Barthwell, M.D.

Whenever we try to justify one illegal act, we lessen all illegal acts. Erasing lines that are drawn in an attempt to move them further back isn’t the answer. It’s leading to an overall mentality that we can do anything we want, anytime we want, irregardless of the law. Such a disrespect for the legal system could only lead to more crime, fuller prisons, more broken homes, more depression, and a nation that can’t hold its head very high.

Whatever problems an individual believes they solve by using illegal drugs can be solved by alternative means - legally. The use isn’t all about the actual drug, anyway. Very often it’s about fitting in, acting out, or covering up. None of which add to one’s character or overall worth.

In order to get the BEST out of life, we have to get the BEST out of ourselves. If you read over the “fast facts” again, the picture should be clear. I’m not judging anyone, nor am I outraged or “disappointed.” I’m sorry if I come across that way. I simply don’t like seeing bright people do things that will push them further from bright and closer to dim and further from lively and closer to dull.

There is no controversy. Only crafty and cunning justifications.

Make each moment worth remembering,
~Joi

A statistic caught my eye and spueezed my heart this morning: 1 in 5 kids is sexually solicited online. My first thought was, “What a sick sign of the times.” Then I realized it was more than that - it isn’t a sign, it’s a call. A call for action.

There are countless things for a kid to do online - research reports, Google homework help, check out what Jessica Simpson’s doing, what Nicole Richie isn’t doing (Cute girl, but really, what does she DO?), chat up buddies on AIM, read about overcoming shyness, play games… the list goes on. Unfortunately, pervs out there know what a cool place the internet is for young people - so that’s where they can be found. Lurking.

Following is a link to a website that you should toss in front of the young people in your life. Tell them to read it carefully. Bribe them to read it carefully. See, it plays something like this:

Read the articles and information, yourself, first. Then, tell them to read it all. If they’re able to give you an accurate run down of the content, then you take them out and buy them a(n) __________ (ice cream cone, hamburger, milkshake, cd, dvd, pizza, ticket to a movie, etc…).

Worth it? Worth it.

Here’s what might be the most important link you’ve seen in awhile: Don’t Believe the Type

Make each moment count double,
~Joi

Okay, so I went off on someone. I got really cross with a family member. I told her she knew better. I narrowed my eyes, lowered my brows and scowled at her….. The nicest thing I called her was an irresponsible, impulsive little twit.

Think she’ll ever speak to me again? Oh, I can assure you she will - after all, the she’s me.

I recently did my best impression of a brainless person - worries me how effortlessly I can pull that off. Isn’t that, like, the worst? When you find yourself in deep water and YOU’RE the one who rowed the boat out that far? No one to blame but the “twit” in the mirror!

Oy.

What’d I do? As you know, if you read any of my blogs - I work online. My family runs a Web Publishing/Web Design/Web Hosting business. I maintain over 12 blogs and 15 websites - the numbers of which are growing. Of course this is in addition to my primary “job” of running our home and caring for our family of 5 humans, 5 cats, and 1 elderly dog.

My days are pretty full, and I love every minute!

But I made things a total headace recently when I decided to start re-doing 3 websites at once. (See why I whipped out the name twit?!) On a fateful Wednesday I looked at my cooking website, my cat website, and my cat blog and hated each with a cruel unChristian hatred. So my emotions dictated that they must all begin an overhaul pronto - even though I’m certain that my brain tried to argue that doing one, then the next, then the next would be the sanest approach. However, in my world - just as in the previous sentence, my emotions are often stronger than my brain.

I hated the way they looked, so the only option was to jump right in and tackle all three. At least that’s what I felt like doing. And so I did. The thing is, it has made me so busy and distracted lately that I haven’t been enjoying what I do as much as usual. I’ve gotten behind on blog posts, I feel hurried and rushed, stressed and annoyed. And all of it on top of the worst sinus infection I’ve ever owned!

I’m freaking brilliant. Except not.

Take a lesson away from my experience. See the man above? He’s trying to wear too many hats at once and looks like a perfect fool. (Of course, if he went with one of the girl hats he’d look like an even bigger fool.) Life’s better when we tackle one thing at a time - when we give it all of our attention and THEN move on to the next thing. And then the next…

I still see a few other sites and blogs that I want to revamp, and I plan on doing so. One. At. A. Time. Don’t want to be called a twit again.

Make each moment before you try to make it count double!
~Joi