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July 8, 2010 2 Comments

Relaxation 101: You Don’t Find Quiet Time, You Make Quiet Time

Televisions, phones, video games, radios.

Alarm clocks, traffic, voices, construction.

Dryers, washing machines, dish washers.

Our inner voice reciting our to do list on a repeat cycle….

Our days are filled with noise, aren’t they?  Absolutely filled.  It’s a wonder that we don’t spend more money on Tylenol and Ibuprofen.   I guess the real wonder is the fact that we kind of become accustomed to all of the buzzing, ringing, banging, clicks, and whistles.

Truth be told, most of us don’t even realize how noisy life is until we find a quiet place to serve as a comparison.

Now, I’m many things, but I’m not one of those people who would teach or preach seeking solace and quiet throughout the day.  I don’t think recluses are the way to go and I’m pretty sure you don’t want to become a hermit.  So, take a deep breath, I’m not on the verge of hitting you with a “Sell your televisions, turn off your phones… let’s go to Zen-ville together….”

Yeah, about that….  No thanks. Clicks and whistles serve a purpose – they let us know we’re alive and remind us that we’re vital.  I think of noise as life’s beating pulse.

However, I am saying this:  For at least a few minutes a day, it’s beneficial (maybe even necessary) to put a muffler on the pulsating noise.  Think of it as a mini little retreat from the hustle and bustle.

Like I said, I love noise and business.  When my home is filled with my husband, baseball games on tv, the dryer running, my cats singing for their supper, kids playing video games in one room, kids watching Discovery Channel in another room, and still more kids cooking funnel cakes in the kitchen…. I’m as happy as a person has a right to be.

It makes me feel alive!

However, I think I’m able to appreciate all of that more (and keep myself centered and sane) when I’m able to wedge in a few minutes that I consider a Quiet Retreat.    It’s as simple as going in my front yard and petting my outside cats while watching/listening to birds.  Sometimes one of my daughters join me and we retreat together.

Last night, the birds put on an excellent performance for me and my youngest daughter, Stephany. Goldfinches, hummingbirds, cardinals, and sparrows provided the only audio and it was beautiful.

After about 10 minutes, we threw on our tennis shoes and took a walk – the retreat was over and it seemed to revive and re-energize us.  Retreats do that for a body, mind, and spirit.  They’re like a cool, fresh drink of water when you need it most.

If you’ve been feeling a little stressed (or even if you feel just dandy!), I promise that a mini Quiet Retreat each day will revive you.  It’ll make you appreciate the pulse of the day more and will provide the balance that your psyche might just be craving!  Find quiet time and relax even if it’s just sitting in your yard for 10 minutes each day.  It’s vital for mental fitness and I think you’ll find that you’ll cope with stress and anxiety better.

Make each moment count double (especially if it’s a quiet one),
Joi

Filed Under: Relaxation, Stress Tagged: , ,
June 8, 2010 2 Comments

Sometimes an Author is Just the Friend You Need

I hear from a number of wonderful readers of Out of Bounds who are dealing with (or have recently dealt with) an addiction of some kind.   A recent e-mail came from a man who had “licked” alcohol abuse thanks to a program in his community.  As common sense would dictate, the pull of the addiction didn’t just magically go away.  Like many people who leave alcohol or drugs behind, he found that each day was simply a new step…. a step away from where he didn’t want to be and a step toward a place he did want to be.

As I’ve said on this site and blog numerous times, I honestly can’t offer any valid information or advice when it comes to addictions.  The only things I’ve ever been addicted to have been chocolate, coffee, and neck rubs.

However, I do have an exceptional author who I can point people toward!  With strength, faith, and more courage than you can imagine, she has overcome the demons that still haunt many people.  The wonderful news is that she can help these people find the strength and faith inside themselves – along with the courage that you can’t yet imagine.

Her name is Deb Scott and her beautifully written book is The Sky is Green and the Grass is Blue: Turning your upside down world right side up!.

If you are, yourself, struggling with or overcoming an addiction, I completely recommend reading this book.  Either click the image, itself, or the link above to read more about the book.

Before doing so, you can click the following link to read my full review of the book on my self help blog, Self Help Daily:  Book Review The Sky is Green and the Grass is Blue by Deb Scott.

Make each moment count double!
~ Joi

Overcoming addiction can be difficult – Narconon drug rehab is here to help.

Filed Under: Addictions, Books and Reviews, Inspiration, Motivational Tagged: , ,
April 28, 2010 2 Comments

Relax, Max! How to Keep Stress From Breaking Your Heart

Everyday Health recently ran a great article on Heart Health: Preventing Heart Disease. There was, of course, the “expected” (yet golden) advice:

  • Maintain a healthy weight
  • Eat more fiber
  • Get at least 10,000 steps in daily
  • Get at least 30 minutes of exercise 6 days a week
  • Have a great night’s sleep

As someone utterly fascinated with the mind-body connection and someone who firmly believes that the two influence one another greater than we’ll ever truly realize, I wasn’t terribly surprised to find the following advice:  Relax!

Stephen Sinatra, MD, a cardiologist and assistant clinical professor at the University of Connecticut had this to say in Everyday Health’s article, “People who see the world optimistically — who see the cup as half-full — [typically] do not get heart disease, as opposed to people who are more pessimistic, who worry all the time, who live in fear — these are the people who have hormonal responses that lead to heart disease.”

If that doesn’t spell it out, I don’t think it can be spelled.

Finding ways to relax and unwind aren’t just necessary for our emotional and mental well-being, health, and happiness – they’re pivotal to our physical health as well.  Our heart doesn’t want any more stress or upheavals in our lives any more than our brains do!

People who tend to stress and mentally grind about things know who they are. Truth be told, they want very much to relax but often don’t know where to start.  There isn’t a deep, mysterious secret to learning how to relax. On the other hand, it isn’t as easy as opening a can of Diet Coke either.  Those of us who were born in a sort of zen state and have never seen any reason to leave it tend to forget that sometimes.  We’re like, “Relax, man, just relax.”

Easier said by some than done by others.  We’re all wired differently, after all.  What’s more, isn’t it a good thing we are?!  I can’t imagine a world filled with zen-bots any more than I can imagine a world filled with stress-n-steins. Either arrangement would make me want to hide in the attic.

When all’s said and done, however, those who tend to stress out, worry, fret, and get their drawers twisted on a regular basis MUST find a way to deal with life differently – otherwise, it’ll deal with them in a completely unacceptable way.  To the tune of heart disease.

Below are a few steps to consider if you’re one of the many, many, many people who are looking for more relaxation.

  1. Remind yourself, as often as needed, that this is life and unexpected things are going to happen. Disappointments, broken appliances, flat tires, arguments, rude co-workers, bad colds, burned meatloaf – and so on – are going to happen.   I’ve never understood why people flip their lids over things that can be fixed.  Save the lid flipping for those things that can’t.  I remember one particularly fun month when my vehicle, our oldest daughter’s vehicle, and our middle daughter’s vehicle ALL needed trips to the mechanic.  My husband never batted an eye.  I thought, “Wow. He’s handling this all amazingly well…”  Then I overheard him telling one of our girls, in a matter-of-fact way:  “It can be fixed.  Not a big deal.”  A perfect lesson:  If something can be fixed, why stress?  Save that for things that can’t be fixed, replaced, or done without.
  2. Don’t expect life to be fair. No one ever said it would be.  Sometimes bad things happen to good people and sometimes good things happen to bad people.  Sometimes your college professor will be wrong and you’ll be right – you’ll know it the whole time you’re staring at the B- on your paper.   Sometimes you’ll try a new exotic recipe that you’re excited about and your spouse won’t even take a second bite!  That’s life and no one said it’d be fair.  You aren’t in it alone – and life isn’t singling you out.  No pity parties allowed.
  3. You know the old saying that starts out, “All work and no play…”  The 2010 version would be, “All work and no play invites stress over to stay.” If your mind is on work and/or making money for the majority of your waking hours, you need to reevaluate.  There’s more to life than money and work!  Take time and make time for enjoyment.  Sit down and watch an NBA or MLB game.  I’m a huge baseball fan and can think of few things more relaxing than kicking back on the couch with a snack and watching a baseball game.  I’m there – body, mind, and soul – from the first pitch to the last.   For those few hours, nothing needs to be done or taken care of…. except maybe a few appeals to the umpire regarding his inconsistent strike zone.  Have a wide one or have a narrow one – just be consistent.  No accordion strike zones when my Cardinals are playing, thank you very much.  As a sidebar, following sports can be a great mental workout – keeping up with names, numbers, teams, managers, averages, wins, losses, divisions, and so forth, is a fun way to stay mentally active and a great way to challenge yourself.  A few days  ago, I grabbed pen and paper to see if I could name all of the National League teams and all of the American League teams.  I did really, really well – I just put the Marlins in the wrong league and totally forgot about the Lions.  Sorry, Detroit.
  4. Take up Birdwatching. Seriously.  Grab a few bird feeders, a bird bath, and even a house or two.  Fill the feeders with seed and the bird bath with fresh, clean water.  If your completely into it like we are, you could even plant a flower bed nearby to make your feathered friends Garden of Eden even lovelier.  I promise you, when you watch these peaceful, feisty little feathered beauties, your stress level will hit rock bottom and your relaxation level will soar.  If you tend to stress and being tightly wound has become a way of life for you, I’m literally begging you to take up birdwatching.  You’ll feel better instantly. Call it your feathered tonic.
  5. Watch the Food Network. This is another great way to unwind and relax. When you come in from work, turn on the Food Network and chill.  Few things are more peaceful than sitting back and watching a cooking show.  Pick a few favorites and watch them regularly.
  6. Enjoy your favorite hobbies and create new ones. Some of my favorite hobbies are cooking, walking, gardening, birdwatching, reading, watching movies & sports, and learning new things.  Learning new things seems like an odd hobby, but I simply LOVE to research and learn about history, new places, animals, nutrition, and so on.  I also want to get back into crafts.  I used to sew, make pillows, and once started to take up quilting.  I would love very much to get back in touch with my creative and crafty side.  I also want to get back into cake decorating.  I used to make some real works of art (such as doll cakes when our girls were smaller – of course, they’d still love them muchly!)  If there are any hobbies or interests that peak your interest, head off to the craft section at your favorite department store – or a Hobby Lobby if you have one of those amazing stores – and have at it!
  7. If you enjoy golf, tennis, softball, or bowling – go for it. Also, if there’s one of these sports you’d like to learn – why not start this month?  The beautiful thing about sports is that you’re multi-tasking in a wonderfully healthy way – you’re relieving stress, unwinding, getting fresh air, AND getting heart-healthy exercise.  I’ll feel a little guilty while you’re outside doing all of that and I’m inside watching baseball, sewing, and planning my next extraordinary cake.  A little guilty… happy, but a little guilty.
  8. Take up yoga.  Whether you’re male or female, 10 or 70 – yoga is amazingly relaxing.  After 30 minutes of yoga, you feel almost like you’ve gotten a full body massage.  Now tell me that wouldn’t feel sensational!
  9. Take a walk. Very often, a nice 10 minute walk is all that’s needed to unwind and relax.  If 10 minutes doesn’t do the trick, keep going!
  10. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep. A lack of sleep (even if you shortchange yourself an hour or two) can make even the most relaxed, even-tempered person in the world a crank and a bundle of nerves.

If you do just one thing today (and it’s Wednesday, so we all know 1 is actually a reasonable number) – make it this:  Make up your mind to make your health and happiness a priority.  Your heart’s health should be one of the most important things to you.  It determines whether you live or not!  I can’t see something being any more important than that.  Find ways to relax and unwind and do so on a regular basis.  You HAVE to include some time in your day (each and every day) for total, complete relaxation.

Now off to to the store with you – the birdseed (and a more relaxed future)  is waiting.

Make each relaxing moment count double,
~ Joi

By the way… have you met my new favorite word yet? – Gambaru! Click the link and prepare to fall in love with the word as much as I have.

Filed Under: Must Reads, Relaxation, Stress Tagged: , , ,
April 12, 2010 4 Comments

Exercise as a Treatment for Anxiety and Depression

We all know that exercise releases “feel good” chemicals called endorphins.  These blissful little guys can leave you feeling happy and peaceful for hours after the exercise.  New research shows that the benefits of exercise go further than making us healthier and happier.  Exercise can help you fight off feelings of anxiety and depression.

Jasper Smits, one of the researchers and director of the Anxiety Research and Treatment Program at Southern Methodist University in Dallas, explains, “Individuals who exercise report fewer symptoms of anxiety and depression, and lower levels of stress and anger. Exercise appears to affect, like an antidepressant, particular neurotransmitter systems in the brain, and it helps patients with depression re-establish positive behaviors. For patients with anxiety disorders, exercise reduces their fears of fear and related bodily sensations such as a racing heart and rapid breathing.”

As author Steve Pavilanis, A Life Less Anxious, points out, exercise can also help you develop more self-confidence. “Once you’ve established a regular routine you’ll feel stronger and more relaxed both mentally and physically. The fact that you’ll look good at the beach this summer is just the icing on the cake!”

So what are you waiting for?  Get outside (or in an wide open room) and get moving. You’ll love how it makes you feel.

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, Mental Fitness Tagged: ,
February 21, 2010 7 Comments

10 Things You Might Not Know About Depression

I recently spent nearly 3 hours researching the areas of mental fitness, self improvement, and self help that people are the most interested in – the areas they’re seeking the most help with and information about.  I have several self help and mental fitness blogs and websites and I don’t want to fill them with subjects I want to write about, I want to fill them with subjects people genuinely want (and need) to read.  That’s why I have contact forms on TMFC, Out of Bounds, and Self Help Daily – I want to know what’s on people’s minds.

Consistently, the following subjects are popular:

  • depression
  • anxiety
  • relationships
  • overcoming shyness
  • losing weight
  • public speaking
  • gaining self confidence

During the 3 hours of research, I found that depression and anxiety are amongst the most searched for topics in the world self improvement.  Last month, over 11,100,000 searches were performed on Google for “depression.”  Over 6,000,000 searches were performed for anxiety and countless others were performed for “depression help,” “depression and anxiety,” “overcoming depression,” and so on.

I had an idea what the findings would be, based upon the e-mail I receive and the replies on the contact forms. But, I have to say, I didn’t realize the numbers would be this high.  The thought of this many people feeling so down and so unhappy – to the point that they actively are searching for advice (like a cry out for help) – makes me profoundly sad.  It also makes me feel pretty helpless.  What can you do to reach out to so many people and let them know that life doesn’t have to be like this?  How can you, in essence, put a hand on their back and encourage them to hang on and dig deeper?

I guess the answer is the same answer that holds true for most things in life – you start somewhere and take it one step at a time. 

One post at a time.

Suffice to say, there will be plenty of upcoming posts involving depression, anxiety, sadness, happiness, overcoming the blues, the difference between the blues and depression, treatment options for clinical depression, books about depression, and so on.  I’ll still post a regular stream of articles and posts about mental fitness, brain games, relaxation, and our other favorite topics as well – they’ll just have a lot of company…  articles with one thing on their mind:  Reaching as many people as possible and giving them a greater quality of life and a larger number of smiles!

We’ll kick things off with a list of 10 Things You Might Not Know About Depression.

  • All of us experience the blues, feelings of anxiety, discouragement, and profound sadness throughout our lives. Many times people mis-label how they feel as depression.  This is a grave error and only makes things worse!  If you feel sad due to a recent traumatic experience (a death in the family, problems in a relationship or at work, a huge disappointment, financial problems, an empty nest…..), keep in mind that this is perfectly normal.  Feelings are a natural thing, even when they aren’t positive.  If something has affected your mood and your feelings, you simply have to ride it out and find ways to cope with your unhappiness or feelings of anxiety.  If, after time, you simply can’t find your way out of the pit or if (even after seeing a great movie or spending time with people who normally light up your world) you can’t seem to remember how to feel happy or “normal,” then seek help.  As with any health concern, never diagnose yourself Chief!
  • Of the estimated 17.5 million Americans who are affected by some form of depression, 9.2 million have major depression – also known as clinical depression. That’s a pretty intense number and I suppose the only positive we can take away from it is this:  At least people who suffer from depression know they aren’t alone – not even close.
  • Two-thirds of people suffering from depression do not seek necessary treatment. It’s obvious what this means, right?  2/3 of people with depression never get better…. only 1 in 3 allows themselves to have a life filled with the love, laughter, and happiness that they deserve.  Ony 1!
  • Of the people with clinical (major) depression who are proactive enough to seek help, 80%  significantly improve their lives. Hopefully the other 20 percent realize they aren’t getting the care they deserve and they keep looking until they do.
  • Women experience depression about twice as often as men.
  • Always remember that depression is a serious illness, it isn’t a sign of weakness or a personality flaw, any more than being diabetic means you lack character or strength!
  • Seasonal depression (SAD) is depression that occurs only at a certain time of the year. SAD, which is often called “the winter blues” usually occurs during winter, when the number of daylight hours is lower. Although it is predictable and understandable, it can be very severe. It’s compounded by the feelings of being “let down” emotionally after Christmas. So much time and effort goes into the holiday season that people feel a little bit of an emotional roller coaster after the festivities are over. Many people also greatly miss loved ones (who have either died or moved away) during this time. Given all of these factors, it’s a wonder SAD isn’t more prevalent than it is.
  • Bipolar disorder is a very interesting branch of depression. Bipolar Disorder is sometimes viewed as its own mental entity, as many people fail to realize that it is (at heart) depression with tricks up its sleeve.  Bipolar Disorder involves episodes of depression, usually quite severe, which alternate with episodes of extreme elation called mania.  Bipolar Disorder was once known as manic depression.  The depression that is associated with bipolar disorder, which is a sever mood disorder, is often referred to as bipolar depression.  People who suffer with Bipolar Disorder are privy to the type of emotional turmoil that most of us, thankfully, can’t even begin to imagine.   People with Bipolar disorder need to find the best doctor they possibly can and then they need to be as loyal to him/her as they are to their own spouse.  Going it alone with any type of depression is completely and utterly ridiculous (and dangerous) – but never more so than with Bipolar disorder.
  • The biggest barriers to overcoming depression? Realizing you are depressed, seeking help, and doing what the doctor says.
  • Teen depression can be very hard to diagnose. After all, so many things go on with a teenager that they’re often written off as adolescent hormones. If the feelings or symptoms seem to be more intense than what other kids their age are going through, it might be time to find out why.

The Symptoms of Depression

  • a persistent sadness
  • feelings of being anxious or on edge
  • feeling empty or “not yourself”
  • sleeping too little
  • sleeping too much
  • reduced appetite and weight loss
  • increased appetite and weight gain
  • loss of interest in activities you once enjoyed
  • restlessness
  • feelings of irritability
  • a tendency to snap at people for no reason
  • a tendency to tear up often
  • persistent physical symptoms and ailments that don’t respond to treatment (such as headaches, chronic pain, or constipation and other digestive disorders)
  • difficulty concentrating
  • inability to make even simple decisions
  • fatigue and loss of energy
  • feeling guilty, hopeless or worthless
  • wanting to be alone and finding ways to be alone
  • thoughts of death or suicide

Again, there are many times during our life when we feel most of the feelings named above – there are even very low times in our lives when we may feel a combination. For example, if you’re going through a personal crisis (death of a loved one, divorce, strained family relationships….), you will cry more often, you will want to spend more times alone (trying to wrap your mind around everything), you will lose interest in things that once interested and even delighted you, and you may feel guilty or hopeless. Your sleep and eating patterns will also be affected. The difference is, most of us come out of this valley – often stronger than before! – but people who suffer with depression simply can’t find the way out of the valley by themselves.

What Causes Depression?

  • Biological Factors. People who suffer with depression may simply have an excess of or a deficiency in certain brain chemicals.
  • Cognitive Factors. People who tend to think negatively and possess very low self-esteem are more likely to develop clinical depression.
  • Gender. Women experience clinical depression nearly twice as often as men. Experts point to hormone problems as a factor.
  • Co-occurrence With Other Diseases. Depression is more likely to occur along with certain illnesses, such as heart disease, cancer, Parkinson’s disease, Epilepsy, diabetes, Alzheimer’s disease, respiratory disease, and hormonal disorders.  Understandable, right? Any type of disease brings extra stress, worry, fear, and burdens into a person’s life.
  • Medications. Some medications have depression as a side-effect.  Needless to say, if you ever take any medication that throws you into an extended period of sadness, speak to your doctor about alternative medication.
  • Genetic Factors. A family history of clinical depression increases the risk for developing the illness.
  • Situational or Life Factors. Difficult life events, including divorce, financial problems or the death of a loved one can contribute to clinical depression.

If you believe that you (or someone you love) may have depression or seem to be headed in that direction, please don’t expect it to get better on its own and never, ever think you have to just live with it.  Your tomorrows can be brighter than today but you have to be proactive and determined.

***********************

Here’s something I found pretty interesting: There’s a direct correlation between fish consumption and lowered levels of depression. A glance around the world really drives the fact home:  The United States has 24 times the incidence of depression as Japan, for example, where fish intake is much higher.  24 times!

Filed Under: Depression Tagged: , , ,
December 22, 2009 3 Comments

Self Help Tips for Stress Relief

Stress is a common problem encountered daily, but it is not always bad. Stress often occurs when you take on too many tasks at once or you are preparing for something you are not used to doing. Your body responds as if it senses danger and produces cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones are good in small amounts because they allow you to overcome certain obstacles in life. During a stressful situation, your body may produce excessive amounts of these hormones and it can have a negative effect on your body. Small amounts of cortisol and adrenaline are helpful for helping you through certain situations. For example, these hormones can help you react quickly if you are in a dangerous situation.

Some of the negative effects of stress include an upset stomach, back pain, insomnia, or headaches. Too much stress can also affect your immune system resulting in difficulty fighting disease. It may cause you to become moody, tense, or depressed, and this can have a negative effect on your relationships.

Because of these problems, it is important to learn proper stress management techniques. There are several changes you can make that can help you feel much better.

Don’t take on more than you can handle. By accepting a reasonable workload, you place less pressure on yourself and should be able to meet your deadline without any added frustrations.

Meditation is an excellent method of relaxation and this can help calm your body and mind. Meditation has many positive effects on the body such as helping clear the mind of any negative thoughts.

Another method of stress relief is to see things from a different perspective. With a different viewpoint, you may see the positive in an otherwise bad situation. This also allows you to have a more positive outlook on life, which can lead to many health benefits.

If you are suffering from stress, it is important to relax and find out what is causing this problem. After figuring out the cause, you can begin making changes to reduce the negative effects of your stress.

Filed Under: Positive Affirmations, Relaxation, Stress Tagged: , , , ,
December 20, 2009 1 Comment

Relaxation 101: Why You Need this Sound Spa Machine!

I don’t have to remind you of the benefits of relaxation or the dangers of stress.  You know how essential relaxation is to your physical and emotional health.  Stress wreaks havoc on every part of our bodies.  It’s imperative, then, that we find ways to totally and completely relax – as often as possible.

Experts recommend that we spend at least 15 minutes each day completely still and relaxed.  Sometimes it’s difficult to shut off the day and shut out the world.  That’s when I especially love my wonderful little sound machine.  The HoMedics SS-2000 Sound Spa Relaxation Sound Machine with 6 Nature Sounds, Silver is one of my favorite relaxation tools of all time. It’s right up there with hot green tea and bath time!

Product Features

  • 6 Nature sounds, ocean, summer night, rain, rain forest, waterfall and heart beat.
  • 15, 30 and 60 second auto off timer
  • Battery or adaptor operated (adaptor included)
  • Natural sleep aid
  • Great for the baby’s room

My favorite settings are Summer night, rain and rain Forest (the sound of rain and the sound birds alway takes me to another level of calmness). The waterfall and ocean are also nothing short of amazing. I believe the ocean is my husband’s favorite. I’ve found him sprawled across the bed after a long day of work listening to the waves crashing on the shore quite a few times.

I often use my sound machine when  I’m taking a bath – well out of reach of wet hands, of course.  The illusion of taking a bath in the rain, in the middle of a rain forest, or even in the yard on a summer evening is all that’s needed to melt away the day’s demands.  By the time the bath is over, I’m so relaxed I almost have noodle legs.

The heartbeat setting is pretty much one I leave untouched. However, it’s a setting that new parents – whether they’re the parents of a human, a kitten, or a puppy – swear by this setting for restless babies. They feel stress, too, after all!

As of today (December 20, 2009), if you jump over to HoMedics SS-2000 Sound Spa Relaxation Sound Machine with 6 Nature Sounds, Silver and place your order, you can have one of these sound machines delivered by Tuesday, December 22, just in time for Christmas. Simply choose One-Day Shipping at checkout.

Whether you have one in mind for a gift for someone else – or a treat for yourself, this could be the smartest $20 you’ve spent in ages.

Make each relaxing moment count!
~ Joi

Filed Under: Relaxation, Stress Tagged: , ,
November 9, 2009 4 Comments

5 Ways to Cope With Stress

5 Ways to Cope with Stress

Guest post by Adrienne Carlson.

It’s worse than the fattiest of foods in making you fat, and it’s more lethal than most diseases in sending you to the hospital; in fact, stress is one of the most dangerous enemies of good health. All of us are subject to stress in some form or the other as we go about our lives, but only a few of us are skilled at managing this curse without letting it affect us physically and mentally. While a small amount of stress is necessary to get our adrenaline flowing and keep us on our toes, too much of this and we end up paying for it heavily. Because stress is a regular part of life, we need to know how to cope with it rather than try to avoid it. And to this end, here’s how you can do exactly that:

  1. Don’t keep it bottled up inside: When something bad happens and you feel heavy inside, it’s best to let it out. Some people find that crying is therapeutic while others prefer to talk to someone they trust. Yet others feel better after they vent their feelings on someone or something – they scream or bang a door to reduce the stress they feel inside. Whatever works for you, find it and use it to deal with stress and get it out of your system.
  2. Know how to relax: Learn to leave the office at the office and your personal life at home in order to prevent the stress associated with one from spilling over into the other area. You end up losing your peace of mind in the process. Practice mental techniques that help you compartmentalize your life and deal with each separately. Know what helps you relax and unwind after a stressful day or experience – you may find music soothing or prefer to read a book. Either way, the choice is yours, so find something that helps you clear your mind and sleep peacefully.
  3. Learn to let go: If there are issues in your life that are not to your liking or problems that you cannot seem to solve, learn to let go. Sometimes, things have a way of clearing up by themselves. So if you know that you are helpless in solving a problem, don’t attempt to solve it at all. Forget about it so that it does not compound to your misery by keeping you stressed out all the time.
  4. Reduce your expectations: There are times when high expectations lead to stress, especially when they involve relationships. When your expectations and desires are not met, you tend to feel stressed and tense, and this makes you irritable. Instead, lower your expectations and learn to be satisfied with what you have instead of wanting more and more.
  5. Accept what you cannot change: There are some situations that you cannot change and some people who never will. So instead of grumbling and complaining all the time, accept them for what and who they are. This helps you avoid a whole lot of unnecessary stress.

It’s not easy dealing with stress, but when you condition your mind to do it, it becomes more of a habit than something that is difficult to achieve.

By-line:
This guest article was written by Adrienne Carlson, who regularly writes on the topic of physical therapy assistant schools. Adrienne welcomes your comments and questions at her email address: adrienne.carlson1@gmail.com.

Filed Under: Stress Tagged: , , ,
October 26, 2009 3 Comments

Keeping Small Issues Where They Belong

Relaxed Squirrel!

One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this:  To rise above the little things.  – John Burroughs

The quote above is a lesson in self improvement, self help, stress management, health, and happiness.  I think everyone should write this quote down on an index card and place it in the place they’ll see it the most often – on the refrigerator, by your desk, on your bathroom mirror… Small things (like the ones listed below) simply aren’t worth getting riled up over:

  • A leaking faucet.
  • Finding yourself low on gas.
  • The cost of gas.
  • A driver who pulls out in front of you.
  • A barking dog.
  • Having to run to the store for butter or milk.
  • Your team losing a game.
  • The server not bringing your refill as quickly as you’d like.
  • A slow internet connection.
  • And so on….

Think about it – these things are so trivial, they’re almost funny!  Yet how many times do people get hot and bothered over these very things… and often things even sillier.  Recently, my husband and I were eating at an Outback in Nashville, Tennessee (Amazing food!).  A group came in and were seated in a booth, by the window no less.  One of the women got ticked off because they didn’t get to choose their own booth.  There were only a handful available anyway!

If a person can get to the place where small things barely even register a response from them, they’ll be happier than they have ever been.  What’s more, they’ll experience stress so rarely that they’ll think they’ve been given a new lease on life. We spend a great deal of emotions needlessly on small things.  Then when then the larger problems arise – we don’t have much left in our tank.  The larger problems overwhelm us because we’re spent!

Start challenging yourself to handle life’s small disappointments and setbacks better.  Amaze everyone around you by smiling and even laughing when something cooky happens.  Several great things will happen: You’ll feel happier and more relaxed.  What’s more, anyone who sees you handling life’s little annoyances this way will think, “Wow. I want to be more like that!”  Before you know it, you and everyone you know will enjoy a much happier and calmer life.

Worth trying, right?!  The next time something starts to register on your stress scale, take a deep breath.  Then ask yourself, “What if this is the worst thing that happens to me this week?”   The diminutive nature of the problem will leave you amazed and probably even laughing!

Make each moment count double,
~ Joi

Filed Under: Mental Fitness, Positive Affirmations, Quotations, Relaxation, Stress Tagged: , , , ,
October 12, 2009 3 Comments

One of the Best Stress Relievers is Also the Funnest

Laughter: Stress Relief!

Last night, I put a kettle of water on for a cup of hot green tea before heading off to bed. If you’re familiar with green tea, you know that it’s best to “catch” the water just before it actually starts to boil. So I stood by the stove, cup in hand – waiting for the water to reach its “green tea” temperature.

As the water slowly heated and brought itself to the proper stage, it reminded me of stress. Sometimes it’s the little things that add up to a boil, isn’t it? The misplaced keys in the morning, the rude server at lunch, the ridiculously slow internet connection, the check that didn’t come in the mail….. again!…. and so on. These small things heap themselves together and cause a slow boil.

We’ve all been there. Even the most laid-back, easy-going person in the world understands stress. Ironically, those of us who are ridiculously laid back may have it worst of all. We tend to allow things to build up until we can’t see in front of us.

The easiest, fastest, and most effective stress reliever in the world is…. drum roll, please…. laughter. That’s it. Laughter is, indeed, the best medicine! The benefits of having a really good laugh are wide-ranging and can even include protection from depression. Laughter can even improve the health of your heart.

Laughter and a sense of humor guard you against the negatives of life that could lead to depression. During the last years of his life, my dad endured horrendous medical procedures, illnesses, hospital visits, surgeries, and setbacks. His illness would have sent most people into the deepest, darkest depths of depression. Fortunately, this man had been born with one of the wickedest senses of humor in the entire history of the world. Somehow, he managed to see the humor in everything. He would have his nurses, doctors, and the rest of us in stitches – all while lying in a hospital bed hooked up to IVs and feeling completely miserable. Daddy went to a pain specialist once who told my mom that the sort of pain my dad had would leave most people in tears. Yet he never felt sorry for himself, never asked “Why me,” and never gave in to pity or depression.

I believed it then and I believe it now – laughter buffered my dad from the cruelty that life can sometimes throw our way. His sense of humor protected him. Had it not been for laughter, his illness would have taken more than just his body. As it was, he kept his joy for life and didn’t allow his sickness to take that away.

Laughter also helps those of us who aren’t fighting a physical battle. Having fun with life keeps your spirits up and helps you feel better about yourself and your life. When you keep your sense of humor, things that bother most people simply don’t faze you.

Laughter is also considered to be healthy for your heart. Research shows that when we laugh, there’s an increase in oxygen-rich blood flow in your body, possibly due to the release of endorphins. This creates a chemical rush that cancels out negative feelings and stress. Other activities that increase endorphins are working out and listening to music.

Adding More Laughter to Your Life
So, you agree with everything you’ve read and there’s only one problem… you don’t feel like laughing?!!? Don’t despair just yet. If what you’re up against (family problems, money worries, school problems, work trouble, sickness) has left you with anything but a smile on your face, I want you to focus on one thing right now: Getting it back. Think of your sense of humor and laughter as being important weapons you’ll need in your fight, because that’s exactly what they are.

Ways to bring laughter into your life:

  • Read the comics.  Garfield, Dilbert, Rose is Rose, and Peanuts are always good for a smile.
  • Turn on a funny sitcom.  Roseanne, I Love Lucy, Andy Griffith, Sanford and Son, Friends… whichever tickles your funny bone.
  • Either go to a funny movie or rent one.   Ask around and see what movies other people recommend.  A few that have had me in stitches have been Knocked Up, Kung Fu Panda, Juno, Coming to America, Napoleon Dynamite, Liar Liar, Borat…
  • Watch Dane Cook’s “Vicious Cycle” – preferably without food in your mouth. You’ll choke laughing.
  • Hang out with someone who never fails to make you laugh.

I’d honestly go so far as to suggest watching a sitcom regularly.  Choose at least one and watch it religiously.  Bringing more laughter into your life helps you to look at the world on a lighter level and, therefore, puts a smile on your face and laughter in your throat more often.  That is always a good thing.

Make each laugh count double,
~ Joi

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